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There’s only one way to know if you can truly be yourself with him and be appreciated for who you really are—and now’s as good a time as any to find out. Awkward pauses and uncomfortable silences aren’t necessarily signs that this isn’t working out—they’re signs that you’re getting to know someone where things can be awkward and uncomfortable, unlike in fantasy where everyone always says and does exactly the right thing.There are certain red flags that absolutely should not be tolerated—like unavailability, active addictions, or abusive behavior—but if this guy tells a few boring stories or lame jokes, cut him some slack. OK, so you snorted water through your nose when you laughed, told him all about your dysfunctional family, and made about a million other mistakes on the date, and now you’re freaking out that he’ll never call you again.At the time, I wasn’t well versed in what a self-identified “nice guy” (also sometimes known in feminist circles as Nice Guys™) actually was: someone who feels entitled to women for his supposed kindness.behavior– which is based on one’s sense of superiority stemming from one’s “nice guy” status and usually accompanied by indignation when women reject the “nice guy” – is actually a telltale sign that someone is not nice.Since you don’t know this person and aren’t emotionally invested yet, there’s very little at stake.It’s easy to be light and breezy when you’re talking about standard getting-to-know-you topics.

Do the things you love doing and fill up your schedule with your own fun plans.

While you might be a pro at first impressions, you could find yourself shutting down and checking out on the second date as the possibility of intimacy becomes more real.

Just like the helicopter-flown dates to private concerts on tropical islands on “The Bachelor” are not realistic or sustainable, the magic and romance of a first date can’t last forever either.

Which is why you’re so surprised when on the second date, you feel like you’re out with a totally different person.

Between all the awkward pauses, you’re wondering what you saw in this guy.